“I have a rule. Ignore praise, embrace criticism. I never seek compliment, it’s generally a dead end.” — Casey Neistat
Hello, Kevin here. Thanks for sticking out, and be a reader. I am now in new routine: Microjournaling, and yeah, life hasn’t been good to me for this couple of weeks. But by helping somebody sometimes makes me feel more useful. So, I wanna talk about denial in depression, and why should you embrace yourself as a depressed person (if you are).
5 Stages of grief, but stuck in 1.
I am sure you know well about Kubler-Ross’ 5 stages of grief, but in depression, you are more likely to be stuck in denial. What is happening with that? In my opinion, there is a simplest terms to be in one: Because you want to. You are in denial because you know well and you are stuck in something called depression, and you are just a person that is full of flaw but you don’t want to accept that you are in one. You don’t want to be depressed, but in fact, you are. You just are.
Shit happens, right? but something must be happening for a reason or another. Stuff might be stuck in the moment that you cannot get out of it, like U2’s song, but yeah, again, it happens. I guess it is just like Neil from “Tenet” said:
“What’s happened, happened, it’s an expression of faith in the mechanics of the world, it’s not an excuse for doing nothing.”
It is like a sayings to some kind of Murphy’s Law, “anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.” But, it has some kind of same vibe to it, but not really. Some times, it can and it will go wrong, but in another kind of sense, it is what makes us move towards our end, the death of us. But again, it is kind of “same same but different” situation, where the main reason of our movement is to defy stoppage, and to resist something. Again, same like denial isn’t it? a bit odd innit?
Hell that makes us different
Denial is sometimes an “engine” to make us move. Moving on, or trying hard to move on from our depression, sometimes starts from denial, and sometimes it makes us defy and resist, because that is how you deny things. Repelling as well, is just another way to deny. Shit happens, again, but there is nothing we can do, because what’s happened, happened, right?
That is the hell that makes us different. Every way possible that treats us into deeper depression is a hell, but we kind of denying things to makes us maybe, better. Or, even worse. The thing that makes us heal starts from a denial, and be stuck. But sometimes, many people doesn’t feel that, and that is what denial feels like, like nothing happens and just moving on with the shit you go through and set a smile upon your face and just take your shit off to the ground, beating up each round, or beaten up each round, your choice.
a bit odd, a lot odd.
sometimes, all we need is some oddities in our life, an entropy. We are an entropy, an unstoppable force to an immovable object. Again, shit happens, but what happened, happened, and oddities and entropies are made to last, and made us what we are now. Our journey starts from denial, and stuck to it is a nature, while the nature itself is an entropy to begin with.
Maybe it is repetitive or some kind of odd, but it is sometimes anything repetitive is a nature to us to begin with, like make a routine, making coffee, or showering, or picking your nose. That is not odd, but oddities starts from being one with the other minds, and not with the same minds. Choose yourself, deny, repel, and be odd. Be an oddities that the world wouldn’t want to see, even from inside.
Finally, an end.
Denial can be brought until the end of your life, and as depression starts to grow, your denial grow as well, but still, it will be on you, as long as you are alive, and yes, embrace anything negative, denying is okay, while embracing is mandatory.
“you can’t wake a person who is pretending to be asleep” — Navajo Proverbs.
